Uh, Hi again. Let's talk.

 

This year has not been the best year so far for me. Regardless, so far, I managed to publish a post in January and March. I really do want to do more. I’ve essentially been mostly bedridden with chronic migraine pain though for the past two years. I’m working on trying to figure out ways to manage it, but in my case it is way more complicated than just simple chronic migraines.

I’d rather not get into that though, just know I am trying. I am still passionate about writing. I still have plans for this blog. I still have a long list of ideas for this blog as well, and a backlog of posts I haven’t yet published because I’ve been in too much pain to be at my computer. Today, as I’m typing this, is one of those rare good days. So, today, I’m typing up a Q&A type post full of questions I found that I thought would be fun to answer. I found them all in various places.

So, I hope you enjoy this random post:

1) What’s your favorite color?

I am partial to pink and light blue, that might’ve been because that was the theme of my bedroom, but I absolutely love those two colors. Also, my birthstone color is turquoise and I happen to like that color as well. So, pink and blue.

2) What’s your favorite artist/song?

My favorite artist is Hilary Duff, no hesitation there. Her songs have helped me through so much. Favorite song though? Yeah, that one is tougher to answer. I don’t even know if I have a favorite Hilary Duff song. I will admit there are some songs from her I like more than others, but a favorite? I honestly don’t know.

3) What do you fear the most?

Good question. I used to think it was heights, but it’s not, and I’m honestly very terrified of heights, have been my whole life. Recently though, I’ve realized my true worst fear, and that’s being truly alone. I’m working through that, I’m not about to talk about that online though.

4) What are your weaknesses?

Kryptonite, that’s my only weakness. Lol, no, but I wouldn’t be me if I didn’t sneak in a Superman reference when I get the chance, but this is not as random as you think when you think about the fact that in college, my Sorority nickname was Supergirl. So, I have two true weaknesses. One is math, probably due to my disabilities. The other is anger. The anger is my true Kryptonite. Well, I guess, when you think about it, they both are? Math is the green K and the anger is the red K. I have been working on the anger over the years and it has gotten a lot better, but there are still things I need to work on and I am working on them.

5) What are your strengths?

My strengths? Well, one of them is stubbornness. I suppose the nice way of putting it is determination, but I don’t mind calling it stubbornness. Being stubborn runs in the family. There was one time where I used my stubbornness to my advantage in a major way. I was supposed to go home a semester early when I had one more semester before I finished two years. I wanted to at least compromise and graduate with a two year degree. Mom at first said no, I’m not sure if she had no idea how it was possible, but I wasn’t about to give up that easily, so I fought. I fought so hard, the president of the college pulled a few strings. It still meant that I had to do 6 classes instead of 5 and spend the rest of that time in work study, but I took it! And I freaking graduated! It’s also my proudest moment, right there!

6) What do you look forward to the most?

Hmm, the little things. I tend to live life day by day, so I just look forward to the little things. I have current little things that I look forward to based on what is happening at the moment, like for instance, during high school, I always looked forward to watching Smallville every week. Now, during the present, I do have a few little things I look forward to. I am currently looking forward to season 3 of The Orville. I am always looking forward to the next episode of Superman & Lois. I am also always looking forward to seeing Alysia’s livestreams on her youtube channel, they’re always fun!

BTW, this is her youtube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/user/avp60685

7) What do you consider to be your skills?

Hmm, well, one of them is definitely writing. Writing has been my passion for as long as I can remember. I’ve always had a way with words. I’ve written stories for as long as I can remember too. Remember when I said my greatest fear is being truly alone? I figured it out through writing, apparently. My mom reminded me of this, but apparently, when I was younger, most of my stories had me having a big family and lots of friends. I did get better at writing over the years though.

I will say this, I used to do the roleplays on a couple forums with a friend. They were based on a show we both used to watch. Once again, I will say, I got better at writing and… yeah. BUT, the character I wanted to roleplay was taken, the second choice was too. So, I made my own character. The sad irony is, I played The Sims all the time, part of that was character creation, lol. Let’s just say, it was very cringy, and the character I made would have made way more sense in another show which, another irony, I didn’t watch yet until years later. I am much better at creating characters for stories now, I promise, and The Sims is a part of helping me with that.

So, yeah, that’s a bit more about me. Like I said above, I have a long list of blogpost ideas and a backlog of posts that I haven’t been able to publish yet. So, I have plans. This blog gives me a purpose and I’m not giving up on that purpose. Like I also said in this post, I am stubborn! Hopefully, I’ll be able to post more soon. Just please, be patient and understanding with me? Anyways, I hope it was fun to learn a bit more about me.

Until next time…

~ Chloe

Let's talk about The Orville

 

Now, I am not a long-time fan of The Orville, but I can say I am a big fan of The Orville. I started not too long ago, about a year ago, but long after season two has been out on Hulu, and binge-watched both seasons. Recently, The Orville crew members have come out and said that the premiere of season 3 was pushed back from March 10^th to June 2^nd, but hey, that’s okay, we’ve waited this long, what’s a few more months, right? That same day, they showed us the opening scene of the very first episode of the season.

Here is The Orville: New Horizons (The First Scene):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xAWJq0fetYw

Now, there are so many theories running rampant about this, some are similar to each other though. I have my own theory and it’s psychological, but despite me saying so in a stream, which I will link to, and my psychological background, you could argue who had this kind of theory first, and that’s okay. But, my theory is that Marcus has PTSD and this is Marcus’ nightmare. I explained it better in my online sister, Alysia’s stream, where we picked apart this scene.

Here is a link to her stream:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gsXVBEFpkjk

Please excuse my voice, I have a speech impediment and probably a deaf accent due to me being hard of hearing. I hope, despite that, you can understand me. Anyways, after that, I saw something from another one of the top Orville fans, JP. He has this theory which was inspired by a tweet he saw that it is actually Isaac’s dream. He actually had some very good points in his video which is why I am including it here.

This is the link to his video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JE0gBH16_Ug

Yes, I do agree, androids do dream of electric sheep. He brought up a good point. I had a theory, which I’m not sure I made public yet, except for maybe once in one of Alysia’s streams that maybe Isaac could learn empathy, so he’s not the only one with that theory, especially with some of his behaviors in the “Identity” episodes and even before that, with Claire.

Despite agreeing with some of JP’s points in his video, I still believe this is Marcus’ nightmare though, so who’s theory is the right one? Place your bets now. Just thought I’d have a bit of fun with this, lol.

Anyways, that's a bit of information from:

JP: The Orville Evangelist

Alysia: The Orville Ambassador

And me (Chloe): The Orville Psychoanalyst

Anyways, until next time, engage quantum drive!

~ The Orville Psychoanalyst

English (and ASL) is strange…

 

Before I get into anything, I apologize for my recent hiatus, I had stuff going on, simple as that. Also, a belated Happy New Year! Now...

Let me explain… This is a quote from my online sister’s Twitter:

“I never realized how weird the English language is. So we use almost a singular word hair to indicate multiple hairs if we're getting say a haircut/hairstyle/etc. Yet in other foreign languages they automatically use the plural versions of these words. Think about it.”

Source: https://twitter.com/avp60685/status/1483523780978880513

Now, let me put this in a little better context with a little bit of backstory. We’re both writers. Neither one of us is published (yet) but one of us is working on it. She’s also bilingual, she is fluent in French. She also knows some words in like 5 other languages, I think? So, I think it’s safe to say she is much better than I am, oh and yes, English is both of our first languages. And here I am still struggling to learn my second language, which is ASL, which I posted about back in October of 2020, Jeez.

So, I did a little research, as I usually do, so I don’t sound like a fool and spread misinformation and found a few articles on how English really is a strange language, and yes, this is really two native English speakers confirming this. So, if two native English speakers are saying this, I wonder what it’s like for people learning English as a 2^nd or 3^rd language, or so on? Here is an article on the weirdest English rules:

https://www.babbel.com/en/magazine/weirdest-english-rules

I mean, sure, I have a way with words, but so does Alysia, the online sister I just mentioned. She’s the linguistic one. I’m the one having trouble continuing with a novel while she probably has 3-4-5 novels already written! How does she do it? I need to know her secrets, especially with all these weird rules. Just google why English is weird, you’ll get a kick out of it.

On the other side of it, signed languages are unique in their own ways too. For instance, each country has its own signed language, maybe more than one, depending on the region, I am not sure. I’m only focusing on ASL for this post, which is American Sign Language, because I live in America. I will admit, I’m still trying to learn ASL, I’m still trying to immerse myself into the culture, but as I was learning, I’ve learned a few unique things, which might be more normal than the weird spoken English rules I talked about earlier in the post. This is just my perspective from a hard of hearing person who is learning ASL as a second language while in her 30s.

One thing I learned is that some signs are the same but they mean different things. This confuses my mom a lot, she knows more SEE and while I know some SEE, I’ve been trying to learn more ASL, but this still confuses me sometimes. Let me show you an example:

https://lifeprint.com/asl101/pages-signs/s/someone.htm

https://lifeprint.com/asl101/pages-signs/c/clean.htm

As you see here, if you click the first link here. You’ll see the sign for “someone”, BUT it also means “single”, “something”, “alone”, and “only”. Now, how can we tell the difference? CONTEXT. How can you tell the context? Facial movements, that’s a big thing in learning signed languages, all signed languages, not just ASL, I am still trying to learn the right facial expressions, still trying to learn my style, etc.

The second link is the sign for “clean”. It also means “nice”. I added this one because there is another way to tell the context. Now, when you sign “nice” it could be accompanied by “nice to meet you”. That is a standard greeting, right? Now, if you sign “clean” it could be signed as “clean-up” like the person signing is trying to say “clean up your room” for instance. That’s how you can tell context as well, by watching the sentence as a whole, not looking at it sign by sign.

Another thing I learned is that some signs can look similar, but they mean different things. Here are some examples:

https://lifeprint.com/asl101/pages-signs/c/clean.htm

https://lifeprint.com/asl101/pages-signs/s/school.htm

https://lifeprint.com/asl101/pages-signs/p/paper.htm

Just note, the first link is supposed to be “clean-up”, it tells you how to sign it towards the bottom of the first page. The other two signs are “school” and “paper”. I showed you those three because those are similar. Of course, there are others that are similar, like “coffee” and another sign that is signed very similar to that, not repeating the word here, but hopefully you can see what I mean here.

That is my experience as an ASL “student” not really a student, but somebody who is trying to learn, later in life. I get signs confused all the time, heck, when I’m speaking, I get tongue tied all the time as well, and that’s with speaking English. That’s because I have slow processing disorder and my brain sometimes goes faster than I speak or sign. Anyways, I’m trying, and hopefully, you learned something here today.

Until next time, stay happy and healthy. 

- Chloe

Get to know me

 

Okay, so I saw this picture that a friend of mine posted. It was a “get to know me” type of thing where it had about 30 questions. You post the image in a tweet and people would post the number of the question they want answered. The person who posted the image would answer. Since that is not accessible to the visually impaired and I'm not very good at keeping answers brief, I thought I would type the whole thing out here and answer them, and you would get to know me as well.

Let's get started:

1) Explain your Twitter handle.

My Twitter handle is @MissWatchtower. I used to be obsessed with Smallville, a show about a young Clark Kent. He had a best friend named Chloe Sullivan. Chloe was, and still is, my favorite character. As the seasons went on, Chloe became a character named Watchtower. I named my Twitter Handle after my favorite character.

2) Who inspires you and why?

Well, if we're talking fictional people, that would be Chloe Sullivan, from Smallville. She was the first person I looked up to because I did not have very many good role models growing up and a fictional character was who I could relate to the most.

If we're talking real people, it'd be my online sister, Alysia. She brought me under her wing twice. The first time was when I first started in my first community, which was the Smallville community. The second one was the community I'm in now, the Orville community. She also encourages me, and I do the same. We've got each other's backs.

3) Do you care what others think of you?

Yes and no. Yes, in the sense that I am very insecure sometimes. When I am insecure, I feel like people judge me more, even if it's not true. No, in the sense that when I am having one of my good days and I am confident, then nothing people say will bring me down, but I usually don't meet very many people who are just mean. Once in a while I do, but not usually.

4) What are you most looking forward to?

Right now? Season 3 of the Orville. Simple as that. If you haven't seen it yet, you still have plenty of time to see both seasons on Hulu before it comes out.

5) What is one life rule you follow?

Hmm... That's a tough one. I guess it's treat others as you would want to be treated, but stand up for yourself when you are treated wrongly.

6) What's your dream job?

It used to be counseling, but now, I don't know. Freelance writer maybe?

7) Which fictional character do you wish you could meet?

Chloe Sullivan. Simple as that.

8) As a child, what did you want to be when you grow up?

A teacher and a writer.

9) If you were a cartoon character, who would you be?

Does Supergirl count? Because she is sometimes animated.

10) What skill would you like to master?

American Sign Language, although it's more like learning a language, not a skill. Or I would like to learn how to do some sort of craft, not sure what though.

11) In what situation would you feel most out of place in?

Any place with a really big gathering, and not just because of Covid. It's because I have really bad anxiety. There was even one story from my time in college, I accidently went way out of my limit and had and anxiety attack. Let's just say I was somewhere where I didn't know if I could get home safely.

12) What artist do you really like, but rarely admit to liking?

I don't just like, I love Hilary Duff. She got me through some really tough times. I only rarely admit to liking her because she is less popular now and the topic just rarely pops up.

13) What gets you fired up?

Writing in this blog, knowing I'm making a difference if I'm speaking up about disability issues, or just writing in here for fun because I love writing.

14) What annoys you the most about the fandoms you're part of?

I'm too new to my second fandom to comment on that, but my first one, well at first, they seemed to support me then all of a sudden, they forget me. That's what annoys me the most. They 'forgot' me in my time of need.

15) What do you do to get rid of stress?

I'm still working on this, to be honest. My technique, currently, is to distract myself, by watching TV or writing, or doing something else.

16) You have to relive one day of your life forever. Which day do you choose?

Umm... none? Let's revisit this question in the future, okay?

17) How quickly do you jump to conclusions about people?

It depends on the person, I guess. Some people are mysterious, some are more like an open book.

18) If you were a doll, what accessories would you be sold with?

A laptop, a tablet, a phone, a cup of coffee, there would even be a disability aid, which would be a hearing aid.

19) What have you done in life that has given you the most satisfaction?

Let's see... I'd say it was the time I fought to stay for my last semester of college to get my Associate's Degree in Psychology. The experience taught me how to fight and not give up.

20) What would be the worst thing to put in a pinata?

I know Pinata is not spelled correctly, techincally, it needs that symbol. I do not know how to do it, I have tried. Anyways, I don't know... razors?

21) What's the biggest waste of money you've seen?

As of right now, this new show called “The Advocate”... The money used in this show could have gone straight to the charity instead of to this show.

22) What common misconception do you hate to hear repeated as a fact?

Anything about disability that the ableists get wrong.

23) Where is the best place to meet awesome people?

I don't know. In my experience, online. But you do have to be careful online too. I feel like I have to say that, but it is possible to meet wonderful people online.

24) What food do you crave most?

Pasta or cheeseburger. I can never get tired of those two foods.

25) What TV series do you keep coming back and re-watching?

Smallville, the show I grew up watching and The Orville, a new favorite show.

26) Among your friends, what are you best known for?

I guess being the logical one, sometimes the advice giver.

27) Who of your friends is most like you?

Alysia, my online sister, better known as AVP60685.

28) What was the most traumatizing moment in your life?

I have an answer, I just can't answer it online.

29) What's the best lesson you've learned from a work of fiction?

That's a tough one, because I've learned lots of lessons from works of fiction. I don't think I can choose just one.

30) What's something you'll never do again?

I have an answer, I just can't answer it online.

Well, those are all the questions. There are a few that are really hard to answer and I tried to answer, but I just couldn't. I think asking number 28 is out of line to be honest. If anyone is dealing with trauma, they shouldn't be pushed to answer from a question out of a lineup like this..

- Sincerely, Chloe

An Updated About Me

 

Hi, I'm Chloe. I'm 30 years old. Before I go into what this blog will be about, I want to tell you a little about what I am like now. I am a disabled nerdy geek. That's what I call myself now and it's not a bad thing. I still love reading and writing and I still love videogames. I also love sci-fi and superheroes.

I have a psychology background, kinda. I'm not a certified counselor, but I've been to college to study psychology and I have an Associate's Degree in Psychology. I still have a few of my textbooks. I took my studies seriously and I really wanted to be a counselor at one point.

Now, I am revamping the content of this blog, in a way. I will still be posting what I want. I still have a few posts I wrote last year, before I went on my unplanned hiatus, that I plan to post. I will still be posting some news that I see when I see it come across my Twitter timeline if I am able. But for the most part, I will be trying something different.

I will be talking about different shows that I like, at the moment, it may be mostly about the Orville. I might sprinkle in some other shows, but I'll explain as I go. What I will do is I will take different aspects of the show and talk about them with a different, psychological perspective. Let me explain:

Let's take the show, Supergirl:

(Warning there are spoilers after this!)

Okay, so Supergirl just came back from the phantom zone. She's been having nightmares/flashbacks of the phantoms. It was a traumatic thing for her. Even Supergirl needs a support system, right? And she's got it.

This is a good storyline, because it makes our favorite heroes even more relatable. What's important is that the writers are showing Kara having a good support system in her sister and her friends.

(End of Spoilers)

This is not a full review, just a very rough first draft. My final drafts would be much better than this and much more involved. There will be spoiler tags and trigger warnings if needed.

Feel free to check out my older posts as well.

Feel free to check out my Twitter: @MissWatchtower

Also... I think that's about it, until next time...

- Chloe

I'm back

 

So, it's been a year... well, almost. I have a good excuse. If you remember, I was planning on posting at least once a month, and I think I was doing pretty well, until October, my last post. It was about ASL, if I remember correctly. Well, soon after that, I was getting these really bad migraines. I ended up in the hospital and yes, it was right in the middle of the pandemic too! I was recovering in November when I had a family emergency regarding my Grandmother. It lasted longer than any of us expected. She passed away back in March. I was grieving for a long while and at the same time, I'm still getting these migraines everyday. I am getting them checked out.

At the same time, I am wanting to do something more, and I miss writing, but also, I feel like I was stuck in a rut with the blog, but I did not want to quit. I was having some sort of writer's block that just wouldn't go away. It didn't help that sometimes, I do not see very much news until it's too late to write about it on the blog because I have my computer off for the night or something.

So, I had an idea...

Parts of the blog will remain the same... but some of the content will be different. I am revamping the blog, in a way. Starting soon, I will be writing more often again, I'll start once a month, hopefully twice a month. I will be writing about shows, but I will be picking out psychological aspects of said show. One post will be about one topic of the show, next post will be on another topic of that show.

Warning: There will be spoilers on those posts and this warning will be written on that post as well. There will be trigger warnings where needed as well for those who need it as well.

I will still be writing about other things such as news I hear or other things that interest me. I still have blog posts from a year ago that I still want to post. I am excited about this blog again.

And again, I am sorry the hiatus was longer than expected. And please excuse the mess as I try to change a few things with the blog.

- Chloe

“I learn learn ASL” (I am learning ASL)

 

I am hard of hearing. I've been learning American Sign Language lately from a certified ASL teacher on Youtube. His name is Dr. Bill Vicars from Lifeprint.com (ASLU), and I've been learning from his videos for about two weeks now. There are a few reasons why I decided to learn sign language. I wanted to still be able to communicate if my hearing gets worse or if I could not wear my hearing aids for some reason.

Let me give you a little of my family history. My Uncle is deaf, so my Mom and her side of the family learned SEE to communicate with him. SEE is Signed Exact English, and most D/deaf people do not use SEE, they use ASL.

I was born hard of hearing. Growing up, my mom did not teach me sign language. I did learn a few signs here and there as I was growing up, but other than that, I never really learned the language. A few years ago, I had mentioned I was interested in learning ASL. I was given the family SEE book. I thought it was the same thing at first, boy was I wrong. I needed more interactive learning than just learning from a book, so I did my research and found Dr. Bill Vicars' website and youtube channel:

Here is the website:

https://lifeprint.com/

Here is the youtube channel:

https://www.youtube.com/c/billvicars/featured

Like I said, I started about a month ago. I breezed through the first few lessons. I am on Lesson 16 as of publishing this, This is the playlist I am watching:

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL6akqFwEeSpiLwRFA3ZvuOWMwPXwI7NqA

It is the official ASLU master playlist that is updated often with lessons. This is the playlist I am going off of because he seems to have updated some of the lessons and it's easier to find the other videos because they are already in this playlist.

I asked Dr. Vicars what the best way to “study” his videos was, and his recommendation was to view the lessons on his website, Lifeprint.com, as well as watching the lessons on Youtube. It will help you review the lessons.

Here is the page with the lessons:

https://www.lifeprint.com/asl101/lessons/lessons.htm

There are other ways to learn ASL of course, this is just the only way that is accessible to me. I'm sure there are online courses you can take. But, I challenge you, if you're not already doing so, to learn a new skill. It doesn't have to be sign language, although it would be helpful for D/deaf and hard of hearing people. It could be learning how to craft something, learning an instrument, learning a new language, etc. But, I do challenge you, before the year is over, to start learning a new skill, if you haven't already.

Until next time, God Bless

- Chloe